This morning I was thinking about change talk or what we say to ourselves and others that precipitates our taking action. On Friday, my intern and I were belaying a group of girls on the rock wall in the gym. Most of the girls made some sort of effort to climb with the exception of one who was not willing to try. In addition to being afraid of heights, she explained that she would not be able to get very high (like the other girls she was observing) so it wasn't worth the effort. She stated, "What's the point?" It was her lack of desire as well as her lack of belief in her abilities that prevented her from changing her state from observer to participant. It reminded me of the DARN-C acronym in Motivational Interviewing as the counselor tries to illicit change talk from the client. The D stands for desire, the A for abilities- or belief in one's ability to change. It's the concept behind self-efficacy. What's true or not about a person's abilities isn't really even an issue, it's the belief about those abilities that can stop someone in their tracks and make them inert. It reinforces the statement by Henry Ford, "Whether you think you can or think you can't-you're right."
Self-efficacy is great and all, but this weekend while studying I was reminded of something beyond thinking you can do hard things. It's more like God+Self-Efficacy. Nephi illustrates this principle with his response to his brothers' mocking and unwillingness to help"for they did not believe that I could build a ship; neither would they believe that I was instructed of the Lord." They did not believe Nephi could do hard things or that he could accomplish what the Lord had commanded. Nephi then gives a great discourse on God's dealings with the children of Israel, similar to Paul's discourse on faith to the Hebrews. Maybe this God+Self-Efficacy is another word for believing in HIS abilities and putting our faith and trust in him to follow his commands. It is God's enabling power through His grace. Nephi is our "go and do" man-definitely not standing around saying, "What's the point?" He knows he can do all things required by the Lord. He can do hard things like keeping all the commandments-even the specific ones for him in accomplishing God's will. He later puts it so beautifully as he states, " O Lord, I have trusted in thee, and I will trust in thee forever. I will not put my trust in the arm of flesh."
I think on Jeffrey Holland's latest conference address about the strong arms of the brother trying to leap to his safety while rock climbing. It was his last ditch attempt to "do hard things-to give everything he had-every last ounce of effort." Yet, it was not enough-he was slipping, falling to his death. But then the waiting arms of his younger brother reached out and saved him from his fall. It was a great talk on the atonement and especially fitting for Easter. (https://www.lds.org/general-conference/watch/2015/04?lang=eng&vid=4154894180001&cid=10) It is HIS arms that save me from the fall. It is HIS arms that I can rely on-to trust. It is my faith in Him and His abilities and my desire to show my love for him through keeping his commandments that propels me forward. It elicits my own change talk. There have been times when I've questioned my life's purposes and thought, What's the point? I'm never going to reach the top. I'm not going to "make it to the Celestial Kingdom." I'm not going to have a "Forever Family" I'm afraid of falling. But I am not going to just stand around observing everyone and refuse to participate. I'm going to try. And if I foster that God-Self Efficacy, I know I can do whatever hard thing God want's me to do. That's the point.
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