38 Bottles: Better Decisions

I'm sure there are all sorts of outcomes for "family therapy" and what people expect to get out of their sessions. Yet I can't help thinking the ability to make better decisions should be on top of the list.  This includes feeling better, thinking better, and ultimately behaving better.  This is the essence of health right?  When I'm sick or hurt, I want to feel better and ultimately improve my executive functioning.

I am fascinated with mental health.  It appears to have some connection with spiritual health- at least  both are not readily visible.  It's hard to diagnose and treat because conditions aren't manifest in a MRI, x-ray, or in a gushing gun shot wound.  Some clinicians use FMRI's and other analytic tools, but it's still fuzzy science.  The whole field is wrought with ambiguity.  It's confusing and contradictory.  But I suppose physical health is as well.  Nevertheless, we try to figure things out.  What makes us tick?  What causes us to act or be acted upon?  What knowledge will really make a difference in our life?

And so as I navigate through different concepts in mental health that may be useful for my family, I believe it helps to have a foundation-or a safe harbor to return to when venturing out into the ocean. It's too easy to get lost in the wild sea of ideas.

All through my children's lives, we gathered each night for "Scripture Time."  In many cases, it was a joke- the rug we sat on often became a stage for family antics; but we still tried to read from the pages of the scriptures to build faith in Jesus Christ.  My children sometimes expressed irritation as I would relate almost anything we did or learned about during the day to the gospel of Jesus Christ.  How I wish I could gather my adult sons and daughters around me and have family scripture time each night.  I know it would still help us.  I try to encourage daily private study of the scriptures, but I feel like they don't think it helps them.  They sometimes even think it not only doesn't help them but makes them feel bad -commands end up feeling like criticism and harsh judgment about various imperfections.

Jeffrey Holland's latest conference talk addresses this issue.  Here are some excerpts;

 Our only hope for true perfection is in receiving it as a gift from heaven—we can’t “earn” it. Thus, the grace of Christ offers us not only salvation from sorrow and sin and death but also salvation from our own persistent self-criticism...

My brothers and sisters, except for Jesus, there have been no flawless performances on this earthly journey we are pursuing, so while in mortality let’s strive for steady improvement without obsessing over what behavioral scientists call “toxic perfectionism.”...

Brothers and sisters, every one of us aspires to a more Christlike life than we often succeed in living. If we admit that honestly and are trying to improve, we are not hypocrites; we are human. May we refuse to let our own mortal follies, and the inevitable shortcomings of even the best men and women around us, make us cynical about the truths of the gospel, the truthfulness of the Church, our hope for our future, or the possibility of godliness. If we persevere, then somewhere in eternity our refinement will be finished and complete—which is the New Testament meaning of perfection.14

I testify that scriptures help more than they hurt.  They can help me and my family.  Though my suggestion may be dismissed as the silly rantings of a religious fanatic,  I believe if we want our family to heal and improve daily functioning,scripture time should be considered as one of our "therapy assignments." We can't gather around the rug and watch the family circus of personalities, but we can do something to incorporate scripture time, especially, The Book of Mormon,  into our daily routine.  President Nelson stated:

My dear brothers and sisters, I promise that as you prayerfully study the Book of Mormon every day, you will make better decisions—every day. I promise that as you ponder what you study, the windows of heaven will open, and you will receive answers to your own questions and direction for your own life. I promise that as you daily immerse yourself in the Book of Mormon, you can be immunized against the evils of the day, even the gripping plague of pornography and other mind-numbing addictions.

That's not just a statement, it's a promise! From a prophet, seer, and revelator  no less.  Wow.  A promise that we can make better decisions by doing one simple thing...a spiritual remedy. That surely is a intervention worth trying!