Resiliency theory fascinates me. How can two people experience the same set of stressful situations and one person is destroyed and miserable, while the other keeps moving forward-even with a little bounce in their step-thus the "Tigger"reference. It's like nothing can hurt them because they are protected with an invisible rubbery substance allowing them to bounce instead of crack and break when dropped. I don't get it. But I want to. I want to be the Tigger and model it for others.
I have unofficially adopted "Tigger" as my RT mascot. From the start of my practice as a Recreational Therapist, I purposely set out to build resiliency in myself and others. Researchers have identified several factors, but I narrowed it down to three for practical purposes. I can't do everything for everyone, but maybe I can do something. These three factors also address three deficits common to many traumatized individuals; these include difficulties with Attention, Affect, and Attachment. I suppose most stressed out people are members of this AAA club. I know I am.
To help me and my students remember these three resiliency factors, I use the acronym PCS since I figure they will always remember where they went to school. This also has reference to the idea of "People Calming Stress vs. People Causing Stress". We do a ton of the latter in our attempts to reach out and help. If all behavior is stress related, according to the Bryan Post Stress Model, shouldn't we be expert at knowing how to calm the stress? Getting back to the PCS and the resiliency factors, the P = Positive Focus. The C= Challenge Self, and the S-Social Connection. These are not only great goals, but serve as coping skills to calm stress.
Positive Focus address the attention deficit. The power to divert attention and energy to the positive is incredibly powerful. I remember spending $300 to support Gordon Bruin's work treating pornography addiction that mentions the principle of purposely paying attention or mindfulness practice. Since pornography lures attention and hooks people in, I find it has compelling application for other type of thoughts that lure us, or thought nets (internet) we get hung up in. His Inner Gold treatment manual was full of great ideas but the one graphic I still remember is of a crowded room of people with a person in red screaming for attention, "Pay Attention to Me!" My thoughts are like that. My feelings are like that. Other people's thoughts, feelings, and behaviors are like that as well. Every intrusion-the millions of would be emergencies are like that. Everything demands my attention-right now! If I spent all day putting out fires or responding to every screaming memmie, I will never go anywhere or get anything done. I have to purposely ignore some distractions. Others I can respond to, especially if prompted to do so. Regardless, mine is the power to choose. Armed with this power, how can I not bounce.
Challenging self is all about managing stress addressing difficulties with affect regulation. I have to take some on so I won't be bored to tears but I can't overload and overwhelm myself with challenges either. A "Can do" attitude is great, but if I put too many demands across my back, it's going to break and I won't be going anywhere. I have to have just the right amount necessary for growth and development. There are numerous studies on the value of self-efficacy. Most experiential tasks foster this sense of mastery. It's why groups are organize around a task, a goal, or challenge and the behavior approach and response is documented. We can believe in our ability to succeed in specific tasks and circumstance. "I can do hard things" is the mantra. Better yet, I can do hard things with help. It's amazing what we can accomplish together.
This leads to social connection addressing the attachment issue. Most talk therapy involves talking to someone-engaging with another human being. Sure we can talk to ourselves, but to have a relationship and share thoughts, attitudes, feelings, and behaviors makes a difference in how we move through the universe. Perhaps it is the most important protective factor in building resilience. How we need each other to calm our stress! Relationship is key. Sometimes the most helpful knowledge we gain from treatment is knowing someone cares about us, wants us to succeed, believes in us, understands us, and thinks we are wonderful. Relationships cause stress and are sometimes the source of trauma, but they are also the remedy. Oh how we need to know how to build relationships to calm the stress...World peace...right? That's the goal. What a bouncy blue marble planet we would live on. We'd be the Tigger Planet.
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