Indispensable Tsunami Wisdom

This morning I was thinking about the loss of one of my co-workers.  Last week we camped, sang, talked, hiked, rafted, cooked, and helped students cope. Many would agree he was indispensable for our program.  Yet, this week I show up for work and... he's gone-fired-swept away by the powers that be.  During my brief time at my current workplace, I've seen the CEO, clinical directors, head psychiatrist, medical director, principal, teacher, laundry lady, head cook, company lawyer, line staff, 30+ year employees, my own boss, and therapists meet the same fate.  At my last therapist meeting, all my previous work family was gone.  Such a large part of my work satisfaction comes from the people I work with.  They create my work environment and I like "how I feel" at work.  If I didn't- I would quit.  Last month I quit an early morning job for that express reason-I didn't like the way I felt and how I was treated.  I'm sure I'm not even missed-work life goes on. Power shows me that even indispensable people are quite dispensable.

To deal with my loss, I sat at my computer to write a letter of recommendation for this therapist but got sidetracked with YouTube videos about the 2004 tsunami caught on camera.  I watched all eight 10 minute segments and found myself crying with the survivors as they wailed and mourned the loss of loved ones swept away by powerful water.  The survivor stories were so compelling, I showed up late for work.  But somehow, it was just what I needed to face the day. 

The last 2 segments were filled with insights-the survivor's take away from their horrific experience. Some dealt with survivor guilt and found peace in knowing they had done their best to help.  Others felt lucky and explained there was not time to think about anybody but yourself and how it wasn't their time to go.  One father contemplated his strong relationship he had built with his teenage daughter he'd lost.  His wife explained how her husband felt like he was experiencing a tsunami everyday as they dealt with their own survivor's son subsequent addiction to pain medication.  After mourning the loss of 5 people she loved, a young Indonesian woman explained it was not a punishment, but a test-to make her a better, stronger person day by day. 

One couple that had their 5 year old child torn from their arms explained how the traumatic event changed them forever but their world hasn't changed. They still have to go to work, earn money to eat-survive. They coped with loss by helping other people in honor of their dead, appreciating the smaller things in life, and taking each day as it comes.  After finding the body of their child, the mother explained, "One part of your life finishes and the rest of your life begins. Your life is over."

Life as we know it seems to end over and over again. The quality of my life is so influenced by the people in it-the people I care about and who care for me.  It is like the tide and crashing surf. Especially if I consider my ever changing, shifting sandy landscape of the people in my life.  I so appreciate the indispensable wisdom and perspective from these tsunami survivors.  They are words to learn from and live by for little old dispensable me.